The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should bokeh offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the bokeh delectable French memek word for memek caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and crot declared the woman an ‘actrice’, memek or bokep sex worker.

Now, bokeh according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what memek most women know and bokep all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, memek you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance art, crot and memek sex bokep as genuine intimacy. And crot when a woman is genuinely aroused, crot trusts her partner and bokeh is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, bokep porn bokep she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokep moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, crot female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, bokeh they’d explain, bokep so they could make their partner feel happy, crot while porn conserving their energy for porn other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokep ‘manipulation’, porn and bokeh that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, porn so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being memek faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: bokep ‘I’m memek enjoying this, bokep but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, porn ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, crot where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland bokep said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: memek ‘As far as I’m concerned, crot that’s what porn you should be doing.’

Well, memek only if you want to attract a certain memek kind of attention.

In their book, memek Sex At Dawn, memek Christopher Ryan and memek Cacilda Jetha concluded the bokeh most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and bokep keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokeh I can understand memek the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokep then men should take heed: bokep the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris